AHOY AHOY! And welcome to the Blog of Hornblower,
Grandmaster Of The League Against Morris Dancers.
In the begining the web page was created and all did wonder at it's revelations about fools who do dance and prance whilst dressed like numpties, yet more would come and join the fun till one day change could be brought........
Oh so you dont think I'm being serious enough!!!!! Well I mean no harm, just a bit of fun at the expense of Morris dancers who I find irritating to the max.
I cannot disclose my true identity for I have plans to infitrate their ranks via covert means, as you can understand my true identity must at all times be kept a close secret.
Soon the Morris Dance season will be upon us, Easter sees them cavorting and jumping about at the 1st sound of a bit of folk music, beardie twonks, They will have you believing its something to do with a green man and Druid fertility rites or some such bollox but dont be fooled.
PURE EVIL..........Thats what it is. Dont be fooled into giving them money they only go and spend it on real ales with stupid names like,
Cock Crippler, Herons Widger or Fumbling Ferkin.
Avert thine eyes from their gawdey coloured costumes and beware the foot tapping that you may experience when suddenly confronted by a team up your High Street or village green.
I will go forth for you and find them,let the experienced Grand Master venture to their dens and show you what they are like, for I will report to you un-censored accounts of what I find.
I will soon have in my posetion 500 stickers with the details of this site which I will place in the toilets and bars of known pubs that support the Morris Dance, I will place the stickers upon the backs of Dancers as they dance,soon the world will know of our cause and then.........Then my friends.............
WE MARCH.......
Comments
Roderick SpodeMon, 18 Feb 2008 13:38:15Are you confident that your work will be completed in our life time or will it be up to our children or even our children`s children to eradicate this deeply entrenched evil.
HORNBLOWERMon, 18 Feb 2008 15:20:55Welcome Roderick Spode.
The task is indeed great and like no other before me I have taken the challenge to vanquish from this earth the Morris Dance. I know well the task that lies ahead and am just laying down the 1st steps towards the end.
My children are with me and,I hope their children will also follow, this is just the start my friend.......Just the start.
Roderick SpodeMon, 18 Feb 2008 19:57:46Gosh, Buggerin buggery !
Reg HastingsTue, 19 Feb 2008 13:28:21Hello mr hornblower. I have to agree that the foot tapping sort of creeps up from nowhere and before you know it you're tapping like a demon. These morris men are either very lyrical and chant a good catchy tune, or they be devils with evil powers of persuasion.
Brother SpodeTue, 19 Feb 2008 19:00:49I agree Reg.
The young or those innocent in the ways of the world could easily be ensared by such insidious temptation
I,myself brought up on Welsh hymn singing and ball room dancing can,at times, feel myself being drawn into their evil web.That`s why it is vitally important we should all stand behind the champion who has made it his life`s work out to stamp out the malaise that is morris.
All HAIL HORNBLOWER !
WizawazSat, 23 Feb 2008 12:56:26You will report to us un-censored accounts of what you find?
Ferking el can we cope with it,do you think we are ready for such material?
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